$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
