But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize