question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
