I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
