He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
