remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize