using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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