and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
i believe in u and ur pee
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
