the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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