why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
i believe in u and ur pee
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