i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
