im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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