walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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