By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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