This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
