capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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