your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
