Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize