Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Randomize
