Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
