But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
