Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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