My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
