i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize