i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize
