She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I understand Curling. That high.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm way too hungover for life right now
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
