i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
