with your own penis?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
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