laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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