is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
