Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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