Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
