Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
