found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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