Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
