for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize