i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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