New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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