Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize
