is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
