Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize