Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
