So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize