What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
