I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
