The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
