I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
