Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
