I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm too high and old for this...
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
