I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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