make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
