Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
